so tell me now
why am i feeling this sense of deja vu?
this strange feeling of familiarity
like one i've experienced before



so don't go telling me
about your mind-blowing romps
while you go frolicking
don't even breathe a word to me



i knew i was right then
with my heart so downright against it
but i would have been so wrong
to keep you from going



why i feel so damn much
is really beyond me
so this very thought
i exclude



now you see me
here i am standing
with my arms wide open



not to receive
but to let go



once is more than enough




today was a pretty okay day.
the weather in the morning was really so nice.
during legacy we were supposed to discuss about our legacy project,
but knowing me and eunice. nyaha
we drifted to another topic.
haha see eunice! i can read your mindd((=
you dun even need to say it man. lol.
I KNEW IT OKAY! haha =p
had learning styles workshop after school.
one word for it:
BORING!
as in seriously lah omg. and the lady kept looking at the group of us
me jamie zan daph shi hua serene.
i think we were making too much noise =p whoops.
but jamie and zan were like getting so damn high. tsktsk!
they're like the maddest asses ever.
we left during the break, headed to the voideck.
where the sec twoos were practising their dance.
and jamie went high - again.
she was like doing corner to corner kicking and everything!
haha mad lady.
then after that,
me jamie and zan headed to parkway for an early dinner
and walk around for abit.
i really want that nike top! =/
headed to Top 20. hahaha yes that most ah-lianish shop in the whole of parkway.
we were like trying to hide our faces and hurriedly get outta the shop,
cos yeah embarrassing mah. lol.
got my fbts!(=
then we were waiting for a cab at the taxi stand.
haha okay im not gonna blog about what happened.
DAMN PAISEH OKAY. =p




okay im feeling really shitty now.
just wondering whats gonna happen.
i really didnt expect it to go so far?
really. i didnt.
just so you know,
when i gave you a hug
and you whispered a 'thank you' in my ear
it made me feel really good.
i've forgiven and forgotten okay.
no hard feelings, really.
we all make mistakes sometimes.
we're human after all, lets face it.
and i've gone through the same shit before.
i know how it feels like to be guilty,
i know how it feels like to hurt somebody
which is why im not making this hard on you.
cos you're my good friend
and i dun want this to spoil our friendship
neither do i want this to bring you down
or make you go through the shit i've gone through
trust me, it sucks.




but now i guess this doesnt matter so much
im really worried for you
and i really hope everything will be okay.
it will be, alright?
i promised you i would stand beside you and
help you through this difficult time,
and i didnt just say it for the sake of saying it
i meant it.
i'll help you in any way i can
give you encouragement in any form possible
i'll just be there for you, okay?
you dun have to go through this alone.



i would be lying to myself if i said
that this isnt ruining our friendship
that this isnt bringing us further away from each other
that this is making me lose my trust in you
that this isnt making the atmosphere around us now awkward.




but you know what?
we'll try okay.
put all the broken pieces together
i promise you i'll try.
although im not really sure what i can do,
but hell its worth a shot.
and i wont just hate you or despise you
for one mistake you made.
if im really a good friend to you,
i would help you become a better berson
i would help you learn from this mistake
i would help you overcome all obstacles along the way
and yeah,
i will.




sigh.
why is the world full of friendship problems
here and there
why cant everyone just be happy,
plaster a smile on their face
and brush silly thoughts like this away?
hmm i wonder.






and when she says she wants somebody else
i hope you know
that she doesnt mean you






please just dont do it again okay.